The Dude Answers…

A frequent reader of The Dude’s wisdom asks, “Why does a guy think it is ok not to own a blazer at age 35?”

I might reframe the question:  “Why would a woman hang out with a guy who thinks it’s ok not to own a blazer at age 35?”

A man will cling longingly to his favorite pair of old jeans, his college intramural championship t-shirt, his old hockey jersey, and a handful of other things. You MUST respect his need to own these. For him to wear these is for him to remind himself of his youthful virility, which may be flagging, but you are ill-advised to remind him of that.

But I digress.

An adult male worthy of female companionship, regardless of his profession (investment banker, school teacher, sanitation engineer, professional athlete) MUST own at least one decent suit, one decent pair of pants (which is to say, a pair that requires professional laundering, not blue jeans) and, yes, gentle reader, at least one blazer. If it’s just one, it’s probably blue, which is fine. He should have at least one tasteful silk four-in-hand necktie that can go with either the suit or the blazer.

Moreover, he should know when it is appropriate to wear these items of clothing, and he should do so without protest, partially because it makes him look like an adult, partially because it is a reflection of his excellent taste and judgment, and partially because failure to do so will result in the evolved woman telling him that he is an uncultured rube who isn’t going to get any for a while.

He should also own a black tuxedo with a black bow tie that he can tie himself, in part because it is a sign of his elan, but mostly because the James-Bond-untied-bow-tie-look late in the evening rivals Bryan Ferry and Seal CDs for encouraging a woman to part with her clothing.

The only exception to the guidelines above relate to rugby clothes, which, after being worn in a legitimate rugby game, are appropriate attire for any occasion.

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